Gay on the dl
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As we await harder metrics and targeted surveys, this might be more of a localised vibe shift than a verified broader downturn.
Final Word:
Ultimately, when DL is performed for gain rather than necessity, it risks diluting its meaning and harming queer communities—prompting calls for more authentic self-representation (Han, 20155; McGlotten, 2013)8.
References
- Brock, A.
L., Jr. (2020). Grindr Unwrapped 2024. (2007). Over 73% of black males, as reported on Oprah, are on The DL.
J.L. MMWR. “But, that doesn’t stop me from going back online and doing the same thing again when I get that itch.”
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By Daniel Nkado.
“DL” stands for “down-low,” a term describing men—often Black or Latino men—who publicly present as straight but privately engage in same-sex relationships.
Originating as an African-American slang for secrecy in the late 1990s, the term later became tied to cultural stigma, media hype, and discreet hookups on apps like Grindr.
As Winfrey showed empathy but also a certain skepticism that King was anything but plain old gay, King confessed his own history of DL sex with men while living with a wife he said he loved deeply and considered a best friend. SUNY Press.
At the gentleman’s request to remain an anonymous source, qnotes will refer to him as Mr. Brown for the purpose of this story.
Mr. According to him, it is quite the norm for families in the South.
“If you were a gay or bisexual man, you definitely didn’t talk about or tell anyone,” says Brown.
The Oprah Winfrey Show Discusses the “Down Low”
To be fair, the mid-2000s hullabaloo about Black men who were having secret gay sex “on the down low, or “on the DL,” was set off by an August 2003 feature in The New York Times Magazine written by Benoit Denizet-Lewis, an openly gay white man.
These homosexual encouters happen purely for sex not a relationship or emotional connection. Vanderbilt University Press. The DL can also refer to behavior described as slick or deceptive.
The term has truly evolved. However, individuals living “on the DL,” and who are in fact homosexual or bisexual, often show no distinguishing traits that would lead someone to believe they were anything but a straight man.
“As long as you don’t act like a flaming queen, have an obvious switch in your walk or use excessive hand gestures when you talk, no one really questions your sexuality,” says Brown.
Brown says he isn’t proud of living the way he does and wishes he was able to be open about his sexual proclivities but is just too frightened of the possible repercussions that he feels certain would follow.
“If I came out of the closet now, my entire life would be over,” says Brown.
As the audience laughed at her raised-eyebrow tone, King admitted that she was right.
King’s appearance and subsequent bestseller unleashed a furious public conversation. “I don’t wanna get caught up in a whole gay culture because people look at gay people as being less than a man—this sissy, this faggot…the greatest taboo is to be Black and homosexual.”
“I think you’re doing a great service to African-American women,” Winfrey told him.
In recent times DL has gone from being used exclusively to describe covert male homosexual behavior of a man fronting (portraying himself), as a heterosexual but in reality is actually a closet Gay man, to now refer to any behavior, action, or behavior that can be described as secretive or deceptive.
Etymology
DL or “Down Low”, attributes its genesis from the Inner City Black and Sub Culture.
Broadway Books. “I’ve always been scared to death that someone would find out about my secret.